बिस्तर एक या दो, मर्जी आपकी Sleep Divorce

Author : Dr. P. D.GUPTA

Former Director Grade Scientist, Centre for Cellular and Molecular Biology, Hyderabad, India


Recently among couple a new trend has emerged called “Sleep Divorce”(https://aasm.org/over-a-third-americans-opt-sleep-divorce/). According some psychologist “It is better to have sleep divorce” rather than regularly falling short on sleep comes with many risks”.   Instead, consider it a healthy change to enhance each partner’s sleep and retire to separate quarters without feeling guilty.  Regularly sleep in a different room from their romantic partner is termed as Sleep Divorce . Many news outlets have covered the concept after scientists have done epidemiological survey, have publicly discussed sleeping separately from their spouses and then analysed and mentioned pros and cons.

According to a SleepFoundation.org survey, couples who choose to sleep in different rooms do so for a variety of reasons. Some who sleep separately from their partner find they benefit from it. Others end up eventually sleeping in the same bed once again. The pros and cons of a sleep divorce likely differ from situation to situation.

Why do couples ‘sleep divorce’?

According to some it saves marriage however in addition to this, there are many other reasons:

Snoring: For some couples, snoring is the culprit. One may sound like a bear in hibernation, while the other lies there with a pillow over their head, counting sheep, and trying to ignore the noise.

Different sleep schedules: Others may have different sleeping schedules due to work, hobbies, or other obligations. One may prefer to stay up late while the other is an early bird. Having different sleep schedules can lead to disturbance in each other’s sleep, leaving them feeling exhausted and grumpy the next day. A sleep divorce can help them maintain their sanity and get the rest they need.

Temperature difference: Some like it hot, some like it cold. She piles on the blankets while he tosses them off. It’s a never-ending battle that can make for some uncomfortable sleeping conditions. Eventually, they might decide that separate beds with their thermostats are the only solution.

Pros of a Sleep Divorce 

Many people who experiment with a sleep divorce experience benefits.

Reduced sleep interruptions: Many people choose to sleep separately so as to reduce sleep interruptions. When partners sleep in the same bed, they may disturb each other’s sleep due to different sleep schedules, the need to get up to parent, snoring, leg movements, sleep-related behaviors, or awakenings caused by pregnancy or illnesses, like seasonal allergies.

Improved sleep quality: By avoiding disruptions caused by a bed partner, about 53% of people who have tried a sleep divorce report that their sleep quality increased after sleeping alone.

Increased time asleep: Similarly, those who stick with a sleep divorce over time report that they sleep an average of 37 minutes more each night while sleeping separately.

Improved relationship: If sleeping separately improves a couples’ sleep, it may also improve their relationship as a result. When both members of a couple fall short on sleep, they may treat each other with more hostility  

Safety: When someone experiences dream-enactment behaviors, as may occur in REM sleep behavior disorder, it may be best to sleep alone to prevent injuries. Hitting, kicking, and other sudden, violent actions may cause serious injury. In some cases, it is important for bed partners to sleep apart to avoid accidental harm.

Cons of a Sleep Divorce 

Although many couples benefit from a sleep divorce, there are potential drawbacks.

Increased cost: Perhaps the most obvious drawback of a sleep divorce is that it requires two available rooms to sleep in instead of one. While that is likely no problem for the high-paid celebrities promoting the practice, not everyone else has an extra bedroom and high-quality bed to spare in their home.

Reduced intimacy: Over one-fourth of couples who try out a sleep divorce end up eventually sharing a bed again later. For over one-third of them, missing each other was what brought them back together. If you’re accustomed to cuddling up with your partner at night, suddenly sleeping alone might feel lonely. This may also have an impact on the couple’s sex life. 

Worsened sleep quality: Although sleeping separately improves sleep quality for some, it reduces sleep quality for others. Of people who tried a sleep divorce, then eventually began sleeping together again, 40% say their sleep quality improved after ending the sleep divorce. Also, one research study found that sleeping with a romantic partner was associated with both better sleep quality and better mental health. 

Security: For some people, sleeping alone may affect their sense of security. This can lead to lighter sleep as they remain in surveillance mode, listening for safety threats within the sleep environment. When a bed partner is present, this may provide reassurance and reduce insomnia.

After practicing for some time Sleep Divorce, if you wish you can give away this: choice is yours!!! (The author has his own study and views)